To Conquer Your Fear, Face It
If there was anyone who was being deep in depression and needed some advice from Dale Carnegie, the author of "How to win friends and influence people", it would be … Dale Carnegie.
The founder of the new tendency "Self help", who is the master of millions of people, used to experience a lot of bitterness and failures in both professional and private life. Not until he published his first book named "How to win friends and influence people" did the string of tragedies stop.
Dale had never studied in university so he tried finding his place in many different professions. He did try being a farmer, teacher, clerk, correspondent, actor, and even novel writer but he was not successful.
His first marriage was a failure followed by a dragging divorce. Not just that, he almost went bankrupt in the stock crisis in 1929. To a certain extent, those successive failures did push him into the exhausted state of mind. There were times when he even intended to suicide because of deadlocks.
However, it stimulated Dale Carnegie to find out the answer to the question "What is the secret of success?" and "What needs to be done to make him become a successful person?". Then, Dale Carnegie acknowledged that the key to the success was self confidence.
Within many successive years, Dale Carnegie studied this matter with all his heart and mind until his hard work was showed in the classic book instructing ways to interact with other people to achieve success in life.
Dale Carnegie’s books were translated into a lot of different languages all over the world, and still are best sellers until now (Up to now, there have been 50 million copies sold out). In addition, he also held psychological training courses and helped over 7 million people find their own ways to success.
While searching the answers for his wonders, Dale Carnegie carefully read biographies of celebrities who deserved to be mentioned with respects.
His book usually quoted sayings of Abraham Lincoln (the 16th President of the US, also called "Great liberator", who abolished slavery in this country), Benjamin Franklin (one of the US Forefathers, also a politician, a scientist), and many other famous historical people.
After publishing the book "How to win friends and influence people", Dale Carnegie admitted "Never before have I realized that healthy people never write books about health recovery. Only weak people who yearn for it are dedicated to this topic.
Similarly, the one who is innately good at diplomacy and knows how to behave will never write down the key to make friends and influence people.
I wrote this book because I myself did make a lot of mistakes, and now, I want to share to make it useful for others as well as for me." This is the book considered the bestseller of 20th century.
Dale Carnegie was born in a destitute family in Missouri, USA. Since childhood, he was a shy boy. Whenever he stood in front of a girl, he always felt embarrassed and heart-broken about his appearance.
"I was always afraid that if I took off my hat and greeted a girl, she would laugh at me" is what Dale Carnegie wrote in another book named "How to stop worrying and start living", which is also a bestseller.
The biggest turning point of this shy boy was the meeting with a member from educational-aid-for-adults campaign. He realized that a lecturer who had a great lecturing skill could catch attention of hundreds of people.
Therefore, Dale decided to study this skill himself by giving lectures for hours to … his cat or even in the dark storehouse alone.
Next, Dale participated in eloquence contests and discussions in high schools, and gradually, he could have enough confidence to argue about almost topics in public.
His experiences hinted him that in order to conquer the fear, the only way was daring to face it and never looking back to previous failures.
Then, Dale Carnegie started his new way by trying in medium field. He offered whatever services he had, from complementary courses to bacon grease.
He realized that if sellers could quickly share the same voice with clients, product consumption would be much easier. Therefore, it is a must to practice diplomatic, negotiating and convincing skills.
However, in order to make your clients or partners trust you, you need to believe in yourself first. That’s why the key to success is self confidence.
"As Dale Carnegie said, the only way to practice confidence was to do things that you were afraid of, and after each attempt, let’s take note your every progress even if it was small" is the comment of Lowell Thomas, Dale Carnegie’s friend, who wrote foreword for the book "How to win friends and influence people".
The core of Dale Carnegie’s psychological training courses is conquering the fear of public speaking by practice speaking every day.
Never had there been a book based on which Dale Carnegie could self-improve; hence, he wrote the books himself.