"Living a life needs a heart…to be gone with the wind…" The lyric of the song "To be gone with the wind" by the music composer Trinh Cong Son started the program with a gentle but meaningful message, encouraging the surprised guests to feel their hearts warmer and more open. " Let’s live with a heart which is generous, compassionate, sincere and belongs to the good". The lyric by Trinh Cong Son is a reminder for everyone in general and Vietnamese businessmen in particular. With this spirit, the night festival "Portrait of the leaders of " How to win friends and influence friends" " organized by Dale Carnegie Vietnam- Dac Nhan Tam Businessman School at New World Hotel on 10th of April aimed at creating meeting and exchanging places to learn experience lessons from Vietnamese and international leaders. Profound experiences successfully applying "How to win friends and influence people" in working and living were shared. Moreover, not only an exchanging and learning opportunities, our leaders had chances to together contribute more to the society through the Fund "Dale Carnegie – For a developing future" initiated by Dale Carnegie Vietnam.
MC Thanh Tuyen and Tien Thanh launching the night festival.
What is "How to win friends and influence people"? And how is a leader of "How to win friends and influence people"? The question were answered by a clip opening the program, emphasizing it is not only an art to win friends, to make people stand on your side, it requires the presence of the Heart, Insight and Talent in everybody. ""How to win friends and influence people" must be practiced by understanding oneself, honesty to oneself, understanding and caring the surrounding people to discover and encourage others’ hidden potentials, help them develop to a higher level. "How to win friends and influence people" can be a personality of a good person who keeps consistency between good words and good actions. Sometimes, it is a simple poet by a father to his children, advising them to live well and happily. Or it is the sincerity and good-temperament to surrounding people following "working hard, making good impression and approaching the community". This is the most proficient human leadership and also the profound meaning of Dale Carnegie’s golden rules.
Interviewing clips of Vietnamese leaders talking about "How to win friends and influence people" can be watched at the website:
Opening the event by a quote by Charles Darwin "It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change and responsible to his/her changes", the two MCs of the night cleverly leading everyone to understand more the values of the programs. In fact, there are many famous leadership principles to achieve success, but why "How to win friends and influence friends"? This is values which have been concluded for nearly 100 years all over the world, millions lives changed by applying these values, even the most successful leaders. "How to win friends and influence people" is quite simple, it is a set of methods how to live well with the surrounding environment. When Dale Carnegie came to Vietnam, we brought a vast ambition and insight, within less than 10 years, all Vietnamese businessmen will together initiate and build a culture including values of "How to win friends and influence people" in the society and especially in daily lives of the leaders. Because, the leaders are exemplary model, big influences to surrounding people, and especially in every family, relatives, friends, organizations and society in general. Again, these spirit and objectives of the festive night were brought to invited guests in particular and to Vietnamese businessmen communities in general.
The dynamic and cheerful atmosphere of the festive night.
In the 100 years development history in more than 85 countries, Dale Carnegie has had opportunities to learn of leadership model of "How to win friends and influence people" on the world. They are not talented in leadership, but also know how to excellently win people’s hearts; things they do for their staffs and surrounding people, even the world are originated from a sincere heart toward the common good. There is good saying: "A successful leader has a cold head and a warm heart", they are people achieving both things.
In the next part of the event, the glory history of the world economy was demonstrated by outstanding leaderships. Firstly, it was Steel King – Andrew Carnegie. He was the second richest in the world history with a property of more than 309.2 US dollars. A surprising thing was that Andrew Carnegie only spent 4 years at school. His success till today has been built by his gifted talent. At 10 years old, he discovered the importance of using name to gain a person’s enthusiastic cooperation. Andrew Carnegie said "Take away my people and leave the factories, but leave my people, and soon after 4 years, we will have bigger and better factories and become King of Steel again."
The next talented leader introduced is Henry Ford- He is a wonderful combination between big ideas and incredible actions. When mentioning Henry Ford, people immediately think about the success of the famous car line bearing his name in America and all over the world. He is the father of the modern working chain for bulk production idea, cutting down expense and production time significantly from 12 hours to an hour. Henry Ford never admitted this success was of himself but generated by the consolidation, devotion and responsibility of a best worker team that he ever had had. In 1914, Henry Ford made a large revolution, he was the first in campaigning increasing salary and reducing working hours for workers and was one of the heavy industry’s bosses sharing profit with staffs, reinforcing the strength of the organisation by motivation the worker by offering incentives.
Within that period of time, there was another figure well-known for a miraculous imagination and non-boundary imagination – Walt Disney, a friend of every family. He was the representative of a clear, beautiful soul always searching ways to bring smiles and happiness for everybody, toward a good society. Walt Disney had a very special ability, he always knew strengths of his staffs and from this, he gave them chances to perform and develop themselves. He led with a vast insight, professional talent and ability to manage and control, with a confidence in himself and the group, a strong belief, a burning enthusiastic and devotion. He always discovered talents, exploited their strengths, kept them, made the staffs happy and voluntary for jobs. For him, "Disneyland is a project of love. We not only created Disneyland for money. If you can dream of something, you can achieve it. We never feel exhausted. I am happy, only happy and happy."
How much do you have to pay to have a lesson about success? Sam Walton it cost only 1 USD. This American living legend has a very simple business principle "The only way to become rich is to save and work hard". He is the second man in 25 leaders having ability to change the world, holding the world biggest retail Walmart, which has 1.4 million staffs up to now, 6000 stores on the world and sales of 400 billions USD (2009) from his small initial capital 20,000 USD. He lives an unexpectedly simple lifestyle. Especially, "unable" never appears in his words or actions. Always fighting for what he thinks right, straightforward, enthusiastic but also close and nice-going, Sam Walton always creates chances for his staffs sharing the company profit, achieving commitment and unity. With a open-minded management, respect for individual contribution, highly evaluation for teamwork strength, he always becomes the exemplary model for all activities in the company, writing songs supporting Walmart, being funny and enthusiastic, making a friendly and easy-going environment for everybody, sharing his information, listening and encouraging everybody regarding their advantages, never saving his praising of staffs and always serving the customers with a whole heart.
The next mentioned leaders is called under many remarkable nicknames such as "Buddhist in Business", "The legend from Omaha", "The Omaha fortune-teller" and "The legendary value investor" – Warren Buffet, the world billionaires ranked second; owning 63 companies. But the most surprising is the his life is completely simple. At the moment, he still lives in a house with 3 rooms in Omaha in 50 the past years, drives by himself, never goes on business on a private plane even though he owns the biggest personal service company. His life philosophy is very simple: "Earning money is not the final target, never confuse between the life expenses with life quality." Moreover, there are many interesting stories about saving "Never lose the money earned by your sweat and blood. This is even more important than earning money." Warren Buffet has taught us to respect what we earn as well as what other people laboriously earn. And never keep good things for yourself but double it by sharing and compassionate with others, especially with people of difficult circumstances. He also has a generous heart, donate more than half of his wealth to Bill & Melinda Gates (more than 35 billions USD) because to him, "The strongest power in this world is love without condition. The more you give away, the more you receive…" Warren has very interesting and meaningful living philosophy:
- Do what you like, follow your values: "I work as I dance claquette. When working, I feel happy."
- Find happiness in simple and not-expensive things: playing card, playing with children, walking in the forest.
- Live simply, not chasing after material life, "the less you have, the better": never use credit card to purchase but only cash, so that you can justify its worth.
- Have a life teacher: someone you can trust and put your whole belief under their leading. Write out the reason why you admire the surrounding people, by resilient practise, learn and turn their good characteristics to yours.
- Live simply: only do things that you have understood and thought about thoroughly "because you can explain it when you make mistake". "Never lose what you earn by blood and sweat. This is even more important than earning money."
- "Earning money is not the final target; never confuse between the life expenses with life quality."
The video clip "Warren Buffet and Dale Carnegie" concluded the introduction about Warren Buffet brought many interesting information about the unexpected connection between Warren Buffet and Dale Carnegie, the founder of global Dale Carnegie organisation. Nobody thinks at 20 years old, Warren Buffet was unable to speak in front of public. He decided to join classes at Dale Carnegie. After finishing the classes, he went straight to Ohama University and told them he wanted to give lectures, standing in front of people and being sure that nobody would dare to laugh at him. Warren Buffet said: "Actually, I has a office degree, but it is not professional or of university level, it is Dale Carnegie certificate because it has changed my life."
The last figures of many leaders "How to win friends and influence people" is the gifted leader of Bill & Melinda Gates Fund which has rescued at least 700,000 people by vaccination program, sponsor the biggest scholarship fund in the history, stop polio, reduce AIDS. Bill Gates is the richest in the world (his wealth valued at 53 billions USD), the pioneer in computer software, owning the biggest software corporation- Microsoft. He is always respected of a supreme intelligence, sharp insight in business, knowledgeable in many areas, decisiveness and a immense charity heart for the society. He is not only always the leader in projects but also the adhesion substance for the whole company in the process of carrying out the common objectives of the corporation. For example, about 30,000 staffs did their best and put in all their effort in 6 months to produce the Internet Explorer competing with Nescape Navigator. He lives by the whole heart for others, generously and compassionately.
Ending the introduction about exemplary models of "How to win friends and influence people", everybody recognised their common point is to live and lead with all passions; this is the prerequisite condition for success and only with passion, we can find a way to orientate, a road to fulfil dreams. The second common point is they always keep improving and developing themselves and surrounding people. Another interesting point is to these talented leaders, the best gestures are given to surrounding people, the simplest and closest thing that everybody feels so simple but not easy to do is "to give", they smile to give hopes, console to give caring, share to give compassion, and do everything to transfer love. "How to win friends and influence people" is not only simply an action of giving.
Ms Nguyen Trinh Khanh Linh started the conference.
The venue atmosphere became more bustling with the appearance of the Chairman and Chief Executive of Dale Carnegie Vietnam, the event host, Ms Nguyen Trinh Khanh Linh, who is also coordinator making conversation with invited guests of the program. The conference room grew active and high-spirited following a small activity led by Ms Linh "Let’s smile with the people next to you and surrounding people", everybody felt more open and optimistic and in a few seconds, we all had new friends. The event conduction was very elegant but not lack of humour, while she managed to transfer all the wanted information – "When we do not have a choice, let’s do it by all happiness, cheerfulness and effort."
Ms Linh impressively began the introduction about 4 honoured invited guests with interesting information collected directly from the people working with the invited guests. Firstly, Mr Nguyen Anh Tuan, Chief Editor Vietnamnet newspaper is "A scientist doing business". The next is Chairman and CEO of the Lotus Corporation, Mr Le Phuoc Vu – "A general and a monk doing business". Thirdly, a businessman bears an artist soul – Mr Hoang Khai, Chairman and CEO Khaisilk Corporation, "An artist doing business". Lastly, Proferssor PhD Huyen Ngoc Phien, Chairman of Vietnam Amata Industrial Zone – " A teacher doing business"..
Mr Tuan, Mr Vu, Teacher Phien and Mr Khai (from left to right)
All information collected from staffs and previous direct interviews with staffs, colleagues, relatives of invited guests before the event have created a surprising element for the night. By that, everybody understood more about their distinct characteristics as well as nicknames they are called. Staffs at the Lotus Corporation often compare Mr Vu as a strong decisive disciplinary general toward the common success. Meanwhile he is also a priest who is always lively, hyperactive and devoted to live and help others by a clear heart. Colleagues in Vietnamnet call Tuan as "the fire source" of Vietnamnet because of his enthusiastic, easy approach and devotion to everybody. The third person is admired by his staffs, partners and colleagues due to his talent as well as the ability to direct people toward the better and nicer. A good leader in management, controlling staffs and an endowed artist in launching ideas to create fine art masterpieces is Mr Hoang Khai. Teacher Phien is admired by his staffs and colleagues with the nickname "A commoner leader", "the modern father in the challenging business environment", always for everybody, fighting and striving for the general common benefits.
These were also what everybody thought and felt about the four invited guests. They have gained a certain success in leadership, conquering people’s hearts. When asked what is a leader of "How to win friends and influence people" and what such leader does, each guest has a different answer.
Teacher Phien: "The leader of "How to win friends and influence people" is someone who is mixed well with staffs, realises the customer rights and duties. I do not think customers are gods, however, the fairness between us and a customer is we commit and do it right. Integration in a company is between the leader and staffs, and customers."
Teacher Phien sharing his experiences. (the second from right)
Mr Khai said: "It is simply blending-in and conquering people’s hearts to reach an agreement, the way a person using his living experiences to persuade and open others’ heart. "How to win friends and influence people" also depends on circumstances and situations. In my opinion, it is to use one’s living experiences and experiences that gained with other, because it is not only between me and a customer or a partner. What we say has to turn people toward these sets of principles, that is important. How to persuade and attract other to one direction. That is "How to win friends and influence people". How to generate attraction to make life better through connecting people and people."
Mr Vu: "A leader of "How to win friends and influence people" firstly has to be a good person, secondly a straightforward person and thirdly having responsibility to everybody. Lastly, he helps others become better. The biggest possession of a human-being is ego. It produces other intentions, actions and thoughts. This opinion originates from Buddhism. When ego is lost, there is no possession, human actions become very honest. This is the highest form of "How to win friends and influence people."
Mr Vu sharing his experiences (the middle)
An invited guest exchanging with Mr Vu.
Mr Tuan: "For me, it is simplest as we have love for surround people. When we open our hearts, we automatically know what should be done, therefore, we would be able achieve "How to win friends and influence people."
Mr Tuan sharing his experiences (the middle)
The four invited guest speakers of the event have many real experiences, large networking domestically and internationally, approaching the different cultures; hence, their sharing are plentiful and diversified on actions they thought as "How to win friends and influence people".
Mr Khai: "I have been to many countries and Vietnam, I found that the culture of "How to win friends and influence people" is the same everywhere. There are people having really good actions, they care, share and treat others very sincerely, it is a good signal. I agree that other countries have many people live with "How to win friends and influence people", that is the foundation for further development, I also agree with Mr Tuan about foreigners nurturing a high learning spirit of new things. I have to admit that China develops with a miraculous speed and Vietnam also develops very fast within the past 15 years and I am very proud that in my chain of restaurant, Charm Cham Restaurant unites all the distinguishing traits from the culture of national pride. It is considered to be the most beautiful restaurant in the world by many foreigner visitors. When we are successful in a particular area, the value of "How to win friends and influence people" reaches its goals there. I am not proud because I am a good follower of this value only because I created a beautiful product on the global scale. Mr Tuan, Mr Vu and teach Phien all had certain achievements, I think they all reach a certain level, we all have to learn from each other, because for everybody, this value varies. The principle "How to win friends and influence people" does not mean always pleasing other people, talking to make people follow, this principle has to be applied when it is suitable, there are situations when this principle utilises power to fulfil its goals, or some people would only use words, gestures or looks, which can change other’s opinions and attitudes. Therefore, mentioning about "How to win friends and influence people", I think we have many other things to learn from and share to one another."
Mr Khai sharing his opinions.
Mr Vu: "Through the clips introducing legendary exemplary leaders of the world, I think they are all leaders of "How to win friends and influence people". In Vietnam, there is also a giant model of this principle – Uncle Ho, a person who sacrificed for the whole nation, I do not mention this fact regarding political opinions, because he was successful to unite everybody to do the most colossal things. In life, we should believe in one another. In world history, I think Hitler can be blindly assumed as a master of "How to win friends and influence people", that is why the whole Germany joined the blood-spattered war. We understand that beside skilful tactics, the leader of this principle has to be a good person. The main prerequisite condition is that your nature has to be good, then the method to "win friends and influence people" comes as skills. Secondly, I think the leader has to be a model, who manipulates others to obtain personal objectives is bad. I think that, in life, we have to live honestly, so that when Mr Tuan met me he said: "I heard that you do business honestly and gain successes, I am very surprised how come there are honest people who are successful?" (chuckling).
Mr Vu also shared his experiences:
"I often say that not only poor people striving to get over their circumstances, even people with social positions, knowledge and degrees, even business owners who are leaders, rich people also have to win over themselves, it is to be honest and to review themselves fairly, I think in human beings there are two good and bad faces. If you want to perfect yourself, you have to increase your good and reduce the bad deeds. I think I am an honest, model and responsible person. On this occasion, I want to tell you about year 2006 when stock market prices surged up very high, our invest is more than 7000 added a distribution system , our stock price at that time is about 30-40/unit. I know in this game, if I nodded my head, I would have had 20 billions, and continuing issuing stocks will generate an added value for the company about thousands of billions. I knew this game and I clearly thought about it. But I believe, there will a small part of the crowd will be devastated because of this decision. I spent a long time fighting with myself against saying yes to own a enormous wealth and the corporation could shorten their growth time, accumulate more capital. It was like whoever fails, you are shrew, you bear no sins. But there would be a whole lot of people would resent. And I think if I live responsibly, I cannot make money like that. I talked to friends in stock market companies, I knew that I would stop this game, I decided to not step any further. When I did not list the stock, some people lost their chances, but up to now, I feel completely comfortably, unregretfully and I think I did the right thing."
There is an interesting disclose by one of Mr Khai’s staffs "I work with Mr Khai and I feel very confident, even though I do not have a lot of knowledge like Mr Khai, but I feel easy and comfortable whenever talking to him". This is a real leader who knows to listen, encourage and blend in with other staffs, he shared "In life, we should be honest with everyone, even with the driver, that is "How to win friends and influence people" in a natural way. Just now, I had a lesson from Mr Vu, when he raised his hand said "I have to do this", this is an order. But it is also a way of "How to win friends and influence people" – which are not only words, actions or well- blending, which are normal things, but also honesty, when people are success, they have to honest, this is a natural thing. For myself, I have an insight, my insight is competition, here competition is immediate action, because in competition, if we don’t take immediate actions, we never circumspect new elements in business and living environment. Therefore, all those actions have to be always available. That means once a spot is recognised to be improved; we have to whatever to improve fastest to ensure the living quality because competition is the scale for product evaluation, and when having created products for life, these things have reached the level of "How to win friends and influence people". When you educate a system absorbing competition ideal, they are people who create the best products for the society." In Charm Cham restaurant, I always direct staffs toward thinking that they are working for the world most beautiful restaurant, I don’t think for people who work in the best restaurant, they don’t know how to readily behave beautifully. We don’t have to praise those staffs, only remembering which department they work in also follows "How to win friends and influence people".
Through this, we realised that all invited guest speakers are very humorous, easy to approach and they know how to break ice, turn the silent atmosphere to a cheerful air. They not only have leadership talent, but also are elegant leaders.
Teacher Phien also gave very practical sharing: "A person of "How to win friends and influence people" has to firstly have morality. I admit that I work more as a manager than a businessman. I am also a teacher doing business, which people consider disfiguration of profession, therefore, in management, I often order my staff to this and that, and I am also a very strict manager in work. I think to become a leader of this principle, firstly we should read the book by Dale Carnegie, and after reading, learn to forget, do not let it influence. Because, when you forget and do those, those become yours and the actions become very natural. In general, this is the problem about discipline yourself. There are many method of "How to win friends and influence people", everybody should choose a method close to our life, most suitable to our nature."
A good leader not only makes excellent decisions but also knows how to share ideas and views with surrounding people, and Mr Tuan is that person..
"In fact, the principle comes to me very naturally; we compassionate, open our heart, love and share together. A leader has to pioneer in creative jobs, create new things to improve, the company will have a significant forward step, about sharing and encourage people to be creative are just ways to unite, make people understand one another in the common goal. In my opinion, considering your colleagues as a second family, if we have a close and cosy working environment, this is a reactant for better creativity. 10 hours in office, and 10 hours everyday, with that time ration, it is not right if we work in a tense mood. We always want relaxation so that staffs feel enthusiastic and motivated to develop. There is a fun example, most of staffs feel reluctant to travel in the same lift with me, initially I wondered why, the reason is if travelling with me, if I suddenly have any idea, they have to take over more jobs." (chuckling)
Ms Diem Quynh, The president of AIESEC Ho Chi Minh exchanging with invited guests
The conference having 4 speakers and 150 guests was successful, helping others understand more and in a wider sense of the culture "How to win friends and influence people". The culture according to Mr Khai is a way to conquer people’s hearts, Mr Vu the honesty, good model and responsibility, Mr Tuan love for other people, Prof Phien well blending, performing what we commit. Everybody has different definition about the culture and its application in life and working. But whichever road you choose, near or far, easy or difficult, conquering or just blending people’s hearts, honesty or love, all have a common point, it is to win people’s hearts.
Ms Linh presenting flowers and souvenirs to 4 speakers
The event closed by a charity auction for poor students/pupils having difficult circumstances. All products honoured invited guests brought were gifts with high spirit values. The present Mr Tuan donated to the auction is "Harvard Memorial Brick", this brick had followed him a long time and he brought it to the program with a hope that all Vietnamese businessmen together contribute building the knowledge foundation for Vietnamese youth generation in the future. The second gift is "Brass Quan Am Statue" by Mr Vu. He thought thank Quan Am Buddhist is a model of "How to win friends and influence people" familiar to Vietnamese people, and even though she is not physically present, but in our mind, heart and belief, everybody in this world believe that she is always present and existent. When thinking about Quan Am Buddhist, we always feel peaceful in our souls. This is the message he wanted to give. The last present is Teacher Phien’s "brass bowl" presented in Thailand with a Vietnamese message "Bamboos will get old and bamboo shoots will grow up", with a wish and an expectation for the next generation to develop and be more successful than the former generation.
The auction was in good spirits and heart-warming, all guests enthusiastically supported and offer unexpected prices, which raised not only spiritual but also materialistic values of the presents (donated to the fund for poor students/pupils). The auction was successful out of expectation of organisers and the total money raised is 77,300,000 VND. The Dale Carnegie organisation also donated 40 millions VND to the fund "Dale Carnegie – for a developing future". Through this program, we hope that there will be more annual scholarship fund to help students in their studying.
Cosiness, sincerity, practicality and propagation are most memorable things about the event "Portraits of leaders of "How to win friends and influence people"" organised by Dale Carnegie Vietnam. The festive night was a milestone confirming beautiful values that Carnegie wanted to deliver to invited guests and the business community. Furthermore, this was also an action to raise awareness (especially leaders) about together multiplying the culture of "How to win friends and influence people" in living and working.
Vietnamese leaders – Let’s follow "How to win friends and influence people"!
Several pictures taken during the auction:
Mr Vu was eager to offer prices for Mr Tuan’s Harvard Brick
Mr Nguyen Van Tri was resilient to buy the brick for his son.
Mr Nguyen Thanh Tan was calm to offer price for the brick and the bowl
Ms Phung Thi Thu Thuy was enthusiastic to offer price for 3 products.
Mr Vu shaking hand and giving the Buddhist statue to Ms Nguyen Thi Thang, the winner with a price of 3000 USD
TTeacher Phien giving the bowl to Mr Tan, who offered the highest price
Mr Tuan congratulating Mr Tan for his successful purchase
Ms Lind presenting the scholarship donation of 36,000,000 VND to the representative of Nha Be district.